Last Friday I turned 34. I know, not very impressive: not old, not young, not reaching 40, just 34. Age doesn't mean a whole lot to me anyway. Ever since we left the Netherlands in 1997, I've hung out with people at least 10 to 30 years older. The first social gathering I was invited to as an expat wife was a lady's 50th birthday party. I remember it quite vividly. Drinking pink champagne at 10 o'clock in the morning with heavily loaded women (jewelry and body fat), talking about their grandchildren, latest fashion and menopause problems. The birthday girl came up to me and asked how old I was. I explained her that I had just turned 22 and recently had moved to Warsaw. She asked if I had children. When I told her that I didn't have any and that I only had been married for 2 weeks, she replied: "Well, that wouldn't have been very decent anyway, would it!" But I actually didn't want to write about this. I want to tell you something about the cool gifts I got. Sudoku toilet paper, a plastic shark, a nice tray and a candy bra. As you can imagine, some gifts were sort of chosen out of selfish reasons. Like the candy bra. Julian had picked it, which didn't surprise me at all. Up till he was four, his teachers or babysitters, or let's say all women that he liked with cup B or more would tell me that he had sneakingly stroked or squeezed their breasts! I think the extended effects of the extended breast feeding really go way beyond what I could have imagined! As soon as I had unpacked this red-blue bra, with according to the box: sexy design, shiny quality and to be consumed before January 2012, the children started asking if they could eat it! So I gave them some, but even after enough candy to make them jump up and down like little kangaroos, the whining just went on and on! I told the children that it was my bra and that they couldn't have more and put it on a shelf. A few hours later, I heard Eva and Michelle whispering, moving furniture and arguing that ended in a full blown fight. Strangely enough, they calmed down by themselves and then seemed to be quite content. 5 Minutes later, Michelle walked in looking like this:

And even after heavy interrogation, she still wouldn't admit that she had eaten from the bra! What a great secret agent is she going to be!